arkenstoners: the voting is so intense you can cut the tension with the knife that your neighboring country will use to stab your country in the back with
[Returns to side-eyeing Europe and thinking about the possibly coming referendum as to whether to stay in the European Union or not]
morichinni: In Eurovision, every one’s a traitor.
God Denmark put on some shoes.
TWO POINTS FROM SWITZERLAND. OH GOD YOU’RE PERFECTION.
cerseillannisters: No points for Germany from Greece. Angela Merkel shakes her head and presses the detonate button on Greece’s economy. Antonis Samaras starts to cry and strangles himself with the cord of the phone he’s been using single handedly to get 12 points for Germany.
WHY ARE WE DOING SO WELL?
It’s sort of sad that 21 points counts as ‘so well’ tbh. Considering the top two acts have like over 200 points apiece.
xlongbottom: when you’re sad remember the malta guy
ONE POINT FROM SLOVENIA. AW YIS.
IRELAND. I R E L A N D.
cerseillannisters: You know what nil points sounds like? Invasion.
united kingdom: [gets 13 points]
graham norton: ladies and gentlemen, we've done it
I feel like Russia and that part of Europe is the clique-y group of popular kids who everyone’s sort of scared of; and when we were all younger, everyone was sort of terrified and respectful toward the UK because our dad was cooler than yours and we had friends in other schools. But no one cares any more and we’ve just grown into that awkward kid who sits in the back of the room and...
holepsi: YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA HOW MUCH I LOVE EUROVISION
cerseillannisters: You can hear Graham Norton’s microphone pick up his “I can’t fucking believe this” muffled laughter.
merdithgreys: chriswolstenhoe: If Greece wins, Eurovision ‘14 will be hosted in a park, the acts will sing on top of a table and there will be no effects. #but at least they’ll be free alcohol
Eric Saade: They [Azerbaijan] won two years ago with Running Away, will it happen again?
Graham Norton: I sure hope not.
I just want us to beat France. Just France. Please, Europe. PLEASE.
italian woman: you look like you're having fun out there!
graham norton (sarcastically): YAAAAAAH!
anoia: pyreo: anoia: what even is eurovision ok
FOUR POINTS. SPAIN YOU ANGELIC CREATURES OF JOY.
Eric Saade: If anyone needs help finding the bathroom, I'll take them.
Graham Norton: Don't do that, Eric, that's how rumors start.
diagonalisable: “you should leave” graham’s cutting right to the chase now
BURN IN HELL, ITALY.
highschooljewsical: graham norton literally gets better as the night goes on like by this point he does not give a SHIT he’s just taking the piss out of everyone i feel it really represents the uk
sophialorens: Daenerys Targaryen Queen of the Andals and the Rhoynar and the First Men, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Breaker of Shackles and Mother of Dragons has left her babies under the care of Ser Jorah to sing for Norway in the Eurovision.
agroncriss: i remember when france gave the uk one point last year and then graham norton said: we built a tunnel to your country
alcoholicrevolutions: chicago-poet: le mis au where master of the house is replaced with alchohol is free les mis au in which all songs are replaced by eurovision songs. at the barricade instead of flashes of guns there is smoke and glitter and water from the ceiling.
ROMANIA YOU ARE MADE OF ANGELS.
[Shouts ‘give Greece all your points’ at the television because I want to watch them attempt to afford it for the next year]
atavanheaven: moriarty: HES SO KAWAII IM CRYING thx for the point bb
the-eleventh-blog: remember last year when greece gained points and graham norton was like ‘you can hear the greek finance minister crying’
Can’t stop laughing because Greece are at the top aHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH IT HURTS OH MY GOD.
ONE POINT. Y E S. V I C T O R Y.
I pre-emptively apologise for swearing at your country of origin almost every one of my European followers.
bennetwilcox: eurovision is divided into two parts the first part is where all the countries laugh at each other’s performances and the other part is where we all get at each other’s throats because we didn’t get points from each other
themarilives: themarilives: SCREAMS WHAT THE FUCK IS EUROVISION i swear to god
consulting-time-lady: Do you hear that thats the sound of the UK getting zero points
OH I REMEMBER YOU! YOU WERE BOTH ADORABLE AND SMOKING HOT. You still sort of are…
the-mosthappy: Swedish Eurovision turning into a social justice musical. I APPROVE.
javeliner: think about the concept of a library. that’s one thing that humanity didn’t fuck up. we did a good thing when we made libraries
havingajonfire: plot twist: greece wins and next year’s eurovision is held in someone’s grandma’s basement
bedussies: [has war flashbacks about the fall out boy hiatus]
Is this a West End-esque performance. It’s like Christmas and my birthday all at once oh my gOD. SYNCHRONISED FLASH MOBS TAKE A FUCKING STEP BACK *THIS* IS A REAL PRE-VOTE PERFORMANCE.
timelordvortex: xxmisty: In 2000 Israel had an entry in Eurovision that included the lyric ‘I want, I want a cucumber’ and ever since nothing’s quite lived up to it But there have been some close calls.
FINAL COUNT DOWN SHIT’S ABOUT TO GET SO REAL.